i don’t like Macs.  goddamn brain washing shiny overpriced computers…  but my boyfriend is a little mac faboy, and sometimes he likes to talk about those infernal machines, and that gets on my nerve because i am a PC girl but i don’t know enough tech talk to counter his stupid MAC-DOS rants.  

admittedly i am always the one instigating these little debates (for no reason at all, usually) and he usually owns me in all of them, but that’s because he’s gay as a rainbow, dammit.

but anyway, 4 ways you can make YOUR boyfriend shut up about his precious Mac.  

-  threaten to break up with him until he shuts up about it and/or get a PC

-  sex withholding always helps.

-  sometimes i do this just for the fun of it (i am not a good person), but if he has a brother, express a fervent desire to have sex with the brother.  his mind will be so consumed with insecurity he won’t even bother with his video games,let alone anything else.  if he doesn’t have a brother, switch to the father.  if the father died a while ago…. even better.

-  this last is very risky should be done ONLY as a last resort:  get a magnet and quickly slide it past the hard drive of his Mac.  be sure to just use a weak magnet, or he’ll suspect something when his Mac starts going on the fritz the moment he turns it on, you want it to fuck up SLOWLY.

these should shut him up at least for a little while.  you’re welcome.  unless you’re a Mac fan, too, then i guess you guys can take turns blowing steve jobs.  maybe one of you can toss a coin and see who gets the dubious (to me, anyway) privilege of giving him rimjobs.  go you.